Embrace Diversity One Word at a Time

Is there someone in your school, neighborhood, or place of business who speaks a different language than you? If so, do you know how to say "hello" in their language? If you do, that's great! The next time you see them, greet them in their own language.

But if you don't know the word "hello" in another person's language, ask them to tell you. Or how about finding out yourself and surprising them with your knowledge of their language. Then

Share your knowledge.

Teach your new word to someone else. Help them learn to speak another language and communicate with someone of another nationality. And don't stop there. "Hello" is just the beginning. It's just one expression but you can easily learn more. Branch out one word at a time and you'll soon be on your way to connecting with and understanding other great cultures of our world.

In how many languages can you say "hello"?
Share your comments below.

25 Rules of Considerate Conduct

In "Choosing Civility", the popular book by Dr. P.M. Forni*, he included the 25 Rules of Considerate Conduct, listed below for your convenient review.
 
But don't just read it. Analyze each one...evaluate it, then share it. Can you think of something you'd like to add to the list? 

There are several ways you can use this list: as a personal checkup, as a school room reminder, as lessons for the little ones, or as a means to get other people involved in civil behavior. 

My personal favorite: Post the list on the refrigerator and pick one each day -- or even better, get the kids to pick one -- and use it as a topic of discussion during dinnertime. 

Whatever your particular preference, be sure to have fun with it -- fun with a civil purpose.

THE TWENTY-FIVE RULES OF CONSIDERATE CONDUCT 

1. Pay Attention
2. Acknowledge Others
3. Think the Best
4. Listen
5. Be Inclusive
6. Speak Kindly
7. Don't Speak Ill
8. Accept and Give Praise
9. Respect Even a Subtle "No"
10. Respect Others' Opinions
11. Mind Your Body
12. Be Agreeable
13. Keep It Down (and Rediscover Silence)
14. Respect Other People's Time
15. Respect Other People's Space
16. Apologize Earnestly
17. Assert Yourself
18. Avoid Personal Questions
19. Care for Your Guests
20. Be a Considerate Guest
21. Think Twice Before Asking for Favors
22. Refrain from Idle Complaints
23. Accept and Give Constructive Criticism
24. Respect the Environment and Be Gentle to Animals
25. Don't Shift Responsibility and Blame 

*Dr. Forni is co-founder of the Johns Hopkins Civility Project.
How do you plan to use this list? Share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Civility Thought of the Day - Sportsmanship

Begin a family discussion on sportsmanship. Help kids to understand the importance of being a good winner as well as how to lose gracefully. Following are thoughts that can serve as reminders for kids and adults. Read this together. Discuss it often. Post it on the frig or in the kids' room as a reminder.

A Real Winner**

When competing with others,
If you don't win
And find you're in the place
You hadn't planned to be in
The polite and courteous thing to do
Is congratulate those who competed with you
And although this is honorable and socially correct
Even better, it's a sign of your own self-respect.



The Spirit of Victors**

You may have been taught how to act when you lose
But here's an even bigger piece of news
There's a more important lesson that can be learned
By players, opponents, and all rivals concerned.
The lesson is this, and should always be
That a real victor wins respectfully.
They are pleased with themselves and show gratitude
They don't display arrogance or behavior that's rude
They consider opponents and how they might feel
And know that acting Big-headed is less than ideal
To Real Victors, a win is beyond the best score
Real Victors know winners can also be sore
So embrace the spirit like real victors ~ have fun
This way, everyone is victorious in the long run.

**Excerpts from my next book:

"Will You Help Me With My Manners, Please?"

& Other Soft Skills

The Teenager's Guide to Character Development

 

{Coming Soon}

 

Civility Thought of the Day

Treat Yourself Well

When we hear the word civility, our thoughts go to kindness and respect with regards to others, but not necessarily for ourselves. To consider others, you must first honor and consider yourself. To treat yourself well each and every day:

1. Take a few moments and remind yourself of how special you are.

2. Keep your mind and body healthy and clean. Not only from physical soil, but free of unhealthy thoughts and behaviors, such as lying, gossiping or bullying.

3. Keep a winning attitude.

4. Obey all rules of safety to remain free of harm.

5. Relax your mind and body on a regular basis; not just when there's nothing else to do.

6. Take time to notice the moment. Stop right now and pay attention to the things you were just taking for granted; your breathing, your heartbeat, the feel of the furniture that presently supports you. Become conscious of any sounds and smells around you that you weren't aware of a few moments ago.

7. Turn 'empty' moments into productive reflection. Look upon those moments as opportunities to create your wants and desires. Trust the moment, yourself and your desires. Then wait for them to show up.

Practice these for starters and you're automatically on your way to a civil life for yourself and others.



How do you remind yourself of your greatness? Share with us in the comments below.

Civility Thought of the Day ~~ It's Rude to Exclude

Excluding others is inconsiderate and causes hurt feelings. Sounds like a no-brainer, right?
Then why do so many of us find ourselves whispering and carrying on private conversations to someone while in the presence of others when we know it's rude?

Now I'm not talking about the low volume that you speak in public to prevent your voice from being too loud. I'm talking about the low mummers spoken directly into someone's ear, usually while hiding your mouth so your lips can't be read.



It's Rude to Exclude

If you only think of teenagers doing this as they hang out with their friends, think again. Sadly, many adults are guilty of this as well, and because of it, and the fact that so many others indulge in this kind of behavior, it is often viewed as acceptable. But it's not.

Rude behavior is NEVER acceptable.

What if you're the person being left out? What would you think or feel?
You'd probably feel like the topic of the hushed conversation -- whether you were or not, right?

So don't dismiss another person by giving all your attention to someone else who is right there with you. If someone wants to talk, giggle or whisper to you with another person present,

Choose Respect Over Disrespect

 

Politely tell them that you choose not to be rude.

Hopefully, they'll take your lead and become more considerate, themselves.


Have you found yourself in this situation? If so, were you the whisperer? The person being whispered to? Or the one excluded completely? What did you do? Did your actions make you feel proud or ashamed?

~~Please share your thoughts in the comments section below~~

The Meaning of Civility

         The Meaning of Civility

C      is for the CONFIDENCE I gain when I behave in respectful ways

And the way I’ll strive to be from now ‘til the end of my days

I         is for the IMAGE I work hard to polish and protect

To shine and sparkle whenever I treat others with respect

V      stands for core VALUES that serve as my relief

When I struggle over choices; they help me stick to my belief

I         is for INCLUSIVE – A broad respect for all mankind

That reminds us in life’s travels, to leave no one behind

L       is for LOVE of Environment that we show when we take care

                     Of our land, our Nation, each other; of our animals, our oceans and air

I        The last “I” is for IMMEDIATELY – which is when I plan to act

                     To help make this world much better and keep civility in tact

T       Urges us all to TURN our bad behaviors into good

And attempt to live responsibly; the way we know we should

Y       For this, I’ll just ask you: “Y-Not” take this time and pledge with me

To be a shining example, and a model of CIVILITY

For more on Civility Awareness Month,  Go here

Self-Applause

Have you been robbing others of your Greatness and your BLISS because you think it's wrong to show what you're made of? If so, then STOP.

Maybe you've been taught that it's wrong to toot your own horn. But why were horns created in the first place? To alert those who are unaware...to let people around you know:

 

"Hey, I'm here and I've got something important to share, show or tell you about!"

Get rid of your fears and the old-fashioned notion that it's wrong to announce yourself and the talent you have to offer. Get comfortable with your Greatness. Live through your BLISS and learn to keep it going.

To conquer any anxieties that creep inside and prevent you from sharing yourself, print out the following verse. Post it nearby to remind yourself often to toot your horn, and toot it loudly!

Self-Applause

 

Applaud yourself, yes you're allowed

To praise your own gifts, to feel proud

You'd do it for others without any delay

So why not for you; why not start today

 

But be careful; Self-applause is a balancing act

You must raise your own spirit and keep others’ intact

For there’s always the threat of cold conceit

So don’t make others feel bad to make yourself feel complete

 Vow to honor yourself truly and you’ll be amazed

At the love you acquire when you give yourself praise

You’ll create a spark and your light will outshine

Any reservations that threaten to enter your mind

And the bond you create with others throughout

Will attest to the value of life without doubt.

                                                                                  

                                                                                                     ~Tammy Thomas Hopson

                       Excerpts from "Creating BLISS ~ Better Living In Seven Steps".

                                                                    

History, Civility & Signs of Hope

With 62 days left in our countdown to May and Civility Awareness Month, we're also nearing the end of Black History Month.

Take a moment to think about this month and the chronicles of the great leaders from our past; then ask yourself...

Did I learn anything from them?

Remember their stories of challenges and afflictions; then ask yourself...

Am I looking into their triumphant hearts, or am I seeing only their afflictions and pain?

And as you recount their stories of survival, ask yourself...

Do I also hear their message for us to live a better life together
and to thrive?

History shows us that a better world was desired for future generations of all races and all stations in life. Those before us knew that the world could be better by connecting and understanding each other.

I choose to focus on this direction that leads to the world they wanted, and I relish in the possibilities.

Unfortunately, I know we still have a long way to go. For example, look at what happened to young Zendaya Coleman on Oscar Night.
Click here for Zendaya on Oscar night


Now see here how she handled it:

Zendaya's BLISSFUL response

My granddaughter sent this link to me because she knows how much I admire Zendaya (and I still believe she was the real winner of Season 16's Dancing With the Stars...ok, I'm over it...well, almost).

Yes, I've always admired her and you can see why. She knows herself and what it takes to remain poised and confident in the face of blatant disrespect. I admire the amount of class that's packed into such a young lady and the way she uses her fame as a platform for positive behavior. She is someone for young kids to model; greatly respected by her peers and adults. She is a symbol of hope for the future.

So here, at the close of Black History Month, think about the past four weeks of discussions of triumph and understanding.

Think about Zendaya's story and how we're still treating each other with disrespect and widespread criticism.

Think of all this and then ask yourself one last thing...

What am I doing to build upon the foundations created for us?

And then make sure it's something positive!  
  
~What did you learn during Black History Month? Please share in the comments below. 

 

100 Days of Civility

The more we become technically- and social media-connected, the more disconnected we seem to get from the basic values of kind and considerate behavior.

In a recent study performed by the Public Agenda Research Group, nearly eight in 10 respondents agreed that lack of respect and courtesy is a serious national problem.

We at Image Design endeavor to combat this common trend of insensitivity, thoughtlessness, and plain rude behavior through our ongoing "Bliss Programs for Life" and "Let's Be Civil" campaign.

The goals of our campaign continue to be:

• To increase awareness of Civility in the workplace, home and community
• To bring developmental focus back to positive, traditional values
• To inspire and encourage the practice of respectful behavior in everyday life

This year we take our campaign a step further and present to you from now thru May 1, 2015

"100 Days of Civility"
 

Why May 1st?

Because May is International Civility Awareness Month and since our "Let's Be Civil" campaign is at the heart of kindness and civility, we offer a jump start by providing the community, families and individuals of all ages with information, games, stories and activities beginning now.

Make your plans to campaign with us and enjoy the fun of becoming an advocate of civility and kindness. 

Begin here by embracing...

 The Meaning of Civility

C      is for the CONFIDENCE I gain when I behave in respectful ways

And the way I’ll strive to be from now ‘til the end of my days

I         is for the IMAGE I work hard to polish and protect

To shine and sparkle whenever I treat others with respect

V      stands for core VALUES that serve as my relief

When I struggle over choices; they help me stick to my belief

I         is for INCLUSIVE – A broad respect for all mankind

That reminds us in life’s travels, to leave no one behind

L       is for LOVE of Environment that we show when we take care

                     Of our land, our Nation, each other; of our animals, our oceans and air

I        The last “I” is for IMMEDIATELY – which is when I plan to act

                     To help make this world much better and keep civility in tact

T       Urges us all to TURN our bad behaviors into good

And attempt to live responsibly; the way we know we should

Y       For this, I’ll just ask you: “Y-Not” take this time and pledge with me

To be a shining example, and a model of CIVILITY
                                                                Copyright 2015 by Image Design Consulting Co.

 

Campaigning for civility was inspired by Dr. P.M. Forni and the Association of Image Consultants International (AICI) who, together in 2009, established International Civility Awareness Month as an activity on Chase's Calendar of Events.

 ~~~~~ Do you feel rude behavior is on the rise? ~~~~~
Please share your thoughts below.

A Shout Out to Dr. King

Although we are observing the legacy of the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. today, his actual birthday was on Thursday, January 15, 2015 and I found it ironic that on that day...
 
...as a fan of the NBA, I was seated in front of the TV ready for the first game of the night, wondering in the back of my mind, if anyone was going to send a shout out to the memory of Dr. King on this day of his birth.
 
Well, there was a shout out, but in my opinion, not one that would have made Dr. King proud.
 
You see, the Basketball Analysts began their discussion with last week's altercation between Kevin Garnett and Dwight Howard. And Charles Barkley said:

"You got to fight sometimes because you can't

let people disrespect you."

He substantiated this with a recap of his fight with Shaquille O'Neal many years ago, saying that he knew he couldn't beat Shaq, but because there were 18,000 people in the stadium at the time, he felt like that was reason to fight. He further said, "You got to throw blows".
 
Looking for clarity, Co-Analyst, Ernie Johnson asked Charles, "Come on, you're encouraging people to throw blows now and again?"
 
Barkley answered, "In certain situations."
 
And as if that wasn't enough negativity, Shaq chimed in:
 
"I hate to say it, but I agree with Chuck. Sometimes you got to let people know 'I'm here also. You may be a star, you're an older star, I'm a younger star...you're not going to disrespect me'. And Chuck is absolutely right; you got to throw a blow to let people know."
 
Well fellas, here's the thing; when you say that no one will disrespect you, I say they don't have to. You do a great job of it  yourself by staying set and ready for self-disrespect, all too easily and all too often.
 
The Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was a Civil Rights Activist, but impacted our lives for many positive ideas; not just the ones regarding race. However, how many people do you know only think Black and White when his name is mentioned?
 
He stood for much more and should be honored for it all. He didn't tell us to be non-violent...but only with regard to race. He didn't say that the way to respect ourselves is to disrespect another. And never did he encourage anyone to be violent.
 
It's amazing how, on one breath, many will honor Dr. King, but on their next breath, totally stomp out all his triumphs with actions that dishonor all he was truly about.
 
I'm sorry for those (like our sports analysts last Thursday night) who believe there are times for physical violence. It's disheartening to know that these people feel obligated to be aggressive, and then say it's for their family, their team, their mentees, or for their own respect; when it's really for their personal insecurity.
 
And what's worse is the vast number of young people who are being taught this tragic message and, even more tragically, learn and follow through with it.
 
We should be teaching our youngsters that although there are numerous ways to gain respect (and be sure to point them out) as with everything, it all begins with the self. It begins with a choice of self-respect over violence.
 
But enough of my words; here are some from Dr. King, himself...

 

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

 

"The time is always right to do what is right."

 

"Nonviolence is a powerful and just weapon which cuts without wounding and ennobles the man who wields it. It is a sword that heals."

 
And finally, one of my favorite quotes:
 

"Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."

Happy Birthday, Dr. King! 

May your message be accurately taken and your example faithfully honored.

~~What do you think Dr. King would say to Charles  and Shaq about their statements? Please share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Truly Simple Pleasures

What calms you? Probably several people in your life, right? But I'm not talking about that kind of calm that comes from those close to you.
 
I mean, what THING seems to slow the world down for you, putting you in that place where all is right -- even if it's only for a few moments a day?
 
For me, meditation, prayers of gratitude and yoga are parts of my daily fix, but there are a couple of simple pleasures I indulge in that I'll share. Enter my favorite drinks;
 
WATER, TEA & COFFEE. And the real stuff, too...no decaf.
 
Ok, ok, I hear all the chatter out there about caffeine. But let me tell you; when you drink as much water as I do each day...2 gallons or more...drink your coffee.
 
Whatever you do though, make it special. I use pretty dishware, or something that's strictly personal, like these...


Gold-Rimmed Glass

And no, that's not wine in the glass. I do enjoy a good Moscato every now and then, but that's flavored water with lemon.

My BLISS Mug

But you get the idea, don't you? Pleasure is just that simple.

So now that you know my thing, why not take a moment, grab a glass or cup, and sip a little tranquility with me. 

Cheers!

~~Add a comment below and share one of your Simple Pleasures with us.