Promote Civility at Work through Blissful Leadership

Become more than a traditional leader. Become the BLISSFUL leader who practices civility every day with

5 Steps to Blissful Leadership

1. Knowledge - More than just knowing you job and the responsibility that goes along with it, the Blissful way to knowledge is through knowing yourself. Through self-knowledge, you find out what you're capable of. With knowledge comes understanding. You understand the kind of leader you are, the kink you are perceived to be, and the kind you want to be.

2. Vision - More than just looking forward, vision is also about seeing things as they really are. Seeing challenges as opportunities. Seeing mistakes as learning tools. Vision for Blissful Leadership is about focusing on your strengths and the ability to map out a direction toward opportunities.

3. Integrity - This involves doing what you know is right, based on your beliefs and values. People often confuse integrity with honesty. Writer, Spencer Johnson says, "Integrity is telling myself the truth. And honesty is telling the truth to other people." Integrity is what you know to be true and honest and behaving as such, whether anyone sees you or not.

4. Creativity - Creativity allows you to imagine possibilities. Tap into your creativity to:

• Create programs of interest
• Channel and pool the energy of your teammates
• Solve unexpected issues with resourceful solutions
• Strengthen your individualism and express ideas freely
• Create enthusiasm, inspire support and motivate disillusioned groups of people

5. Time - This involves time management in the traditional sense of schedules, appointments, projects and plans; but it also involves the ability to manage the elements of time to deal with what is happening in the present time and place. Keep your attention on your 'present' and when situations appear, take care of them issue by issue -- moment by moment.

Spread civility and share your thoughts and ideas below.

For more on Civility Awareness Month,  Go here

How to Adjust to Change with Ease

This past Sunday, on March 10th, did you remember to Spring Forward and set your clocks ahead; anticipating fresh new life, new ideas and renewed hope? 

Or perhaps you spent the first day of Daylight Savings Time all droopy-eyed, unsettled, and in a daze.

That was me, quite a few years ago.

It was during the time when most, if not all clocks in the house were manually set -- you know, before cell phones and other techno gadgets made the changes for you. I actually went through half the day before I realized it was the first day of Daylight Savings Time.

Neither Michael nor I could figure out why TV programs and radio announcers seemed 'off-schedule' that day. We chalked them up as hiccups in our cable service and thought the radio announcers were just wrong. 

Even when the newspaper came 'early', I still didn't get it. Now if I was like most people who actually read the Sunday paper on Sunday instead of on Monday or Tuesday like I usually do, my memory would've been jarred sooner from seeing the bold print at the top of the front page: 

DID YOU REMEMBER TO SET YOUR CLOCKS UP ONE HOUR?

I guess it also proved that sometimes it's better for couples to be less in sync and more balanced-out. I mean, it would've been nice if ONE of us remembered.

 

Friends came over the night before and we were up pretty late. Neither of us thought anything about re-setting the clock before we turned in. We paid for it though, as we spent half the day in oblivious confusion and disorder. But you can best believe that I was alert and ready that following Monday morning. 

I adjusted.

Daylight Savings Time is a change just like any other change we go through. No matter how small, change requires an adjustment. And in spite of the physical and mental challenges that we undertake on a daily basis, our bodies are not made to just jump ahead one hour and then comfortably move on. We fall into rhythms and stay there until something shakes us up. 

I know some of you are probably thinking: "Oh, it's just an hour...an hour doesn't make a difference."

Well, you're right...and wrong. Yes, it is just an hour, but that hour IS the difference.

When you're accustomed to doing something for months, no matter what it is, you've got to put forth some effort to adjust to changing that habit.

You don't think an hour makes a difference? Think back to Monday when you felt a little off. Oh, I'm sure you got through the day OK, but how many times did you pass off your sluggish feelings and fuzzy thinking as typical Monday Blues? How many times did you fool yourself into believing you weren't affected at all? 

There's no need to fool yourself. Adjust yourself.

Don't just get through the next few days of Daylight Savings Time; do so triumphantly.

How?

Simply.

No earth-shattering antics; no outrageous rituals. Just pure, simple behavior.

Simply change your routine.

Go to bed a little earlier for a few days or until you feel like yourself again. Refrain from Daylight Savings Time-talk. You know, the clock says it's 3:00 but it's really 2:00 type of talk that goes on for about a week after the time change.

Simple behavior -- that's all it takes -- and you'll soon be rooted in the new time with renewed energy.

Daylight Savings Time is only one type of change. But the same concept applies with any change you want to accomplish with comfort and ease. Do it simply.

Prepare for the change you want to make. Think of what it will take to feel great after you've made the change you chose to make. Think about it, then adjust your mind and body to accomplish it. Adjust to it...simply.

If you want to do something different or something new, adjust yourself and accomplish it. Make the effort to change, then accomplish your goal. But do it simply. 

Want to change your money flow? Then adjust your money handling behavior. Change your saving and spending habits -- simply -- a little at a time. Ease into your new routine.

Do you crave a more interesting life? Then adjust your interests and interactions...simply. Contribute and participate. Practice a new skill or talent. Learn a new hobby. Join a community group; meet new people, get interested, get involved.

Who knew that such a lesson could be embedded within Daylight Savings Time?

Reaching any goal requires an adjustment. Whether it's a better home life or a fulfilling job you're after; whether it's more money, or a smooth transition into Daylight Savings Time. Adjust. Ease yourself into the way you want to be. But do it simply. 

Focus on the target. Appreciate the run; enjoy the win. And don't just step on the finish line of your goal. Cross it triumphantly. It's the difference between mere accomplishment and Blissful victory.

~Tell Tammy~

So how about it? Did you remember to adjust your clocks on time? If not, how long did it take you to realize it? How did you manage throughout the day under the 'wrong' time? Share with us in the comment section below. We'd love to hear from you. 

When Celebrating Valentine's Day, Don't Overlook Your Heart

People all over are making plans for Valentine's Day which will be here in just a few days. With all the talk of holiday gifts, love and even the sentiments of "I Heart You", many will still overlook one special thing that will make their Valentine's Day unique:

A Healthy Heart

Like the rest of the body, the heart responds positively to a balanced diet -- not only through food and exercise -- but also through the attention and care that accompanies love; namely Spiritual Love, Self-Love and yes, Romantic Love.

This Valentine's Day, make sure the emphasis is on creating a healthy heart for you and your partner, your family, or whoever you celebrate the day with. Focus on the heart, not just the gifts, flowers or the candy.

Valentine's Day is much more than flowers, gifts and chocolates. It should be focused on the Healthy Heart instead of the holiday blueprints induced by our commercial culture.

Gifts are nice; yes even candy, but over time, we tend to forget the real reasons behind the gifts we give and receive. We forget that it should only be about you and the people you love.

You might be thinking, "Isn't that why we give the gifts, especially the expensive ones?" 

Well,  you're half-right. It's not only about the gift or how much money was spent on it; it's about the time and emotions put into choosing the perfect gift and the feeling it incites when accepted.

It's not about giving flowers simply because it's done in all the love stories. It's about understanding the relationship between you and your partner and syncing the right color and type of flower to signify the value and worth of the relationship.

(More on the meaning behind types and colors of flowers in a later post)

As for the candy -- well, what can I say when around this time of year, the days rain heart-shaped boxes filled with tasty varieties of luscious, squishy chocolate candies, just waiting for a pinch to see what's inside before popping into your mouth.

Speaking as one who adores candy...namely chocolate...I used to welcome Valentine's Day candy boxes and the whole assortment of flavors. But for health-related reasons (not to mention calories), I left them alone. So my heart-shaped pleasures came to an end days ago.

Bummer, right? Well, not really.

Now, each year, instead of crying over spilt milk-chocolate, or pigging out on the array of melt-in-your-mouth goodies that constantly greet me on every magazine page, every television commercial, every highway billboard, and at every turn of the grocery store aisle; Michael and I usually plan a Heart-Healthy Valentine's Day that consists of quality alone - don't answer the door or the phone - time together. Sometimes, it's a quiet, romantic meal at home or a relaxing day-trip somewhere else.

This year, because Michael has to work that afternoon and evening, we'll probably celebrate on a day other than the 14th. Either way, the focus will be the two of us and how we plan to use the time available. Not when the calendar tells us, nor in the traditional fashion that's commercially dictated to us; but in the way we want to.

And better yet, our way won't clog the arteries, throw us in debt, cause headaches or put bumps on my face.

Whichever way we decide to spend the time though, I guess it couldn't hurt to embrace those insightful words of Charles M. Schulz:

"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt."

 Have a Blissful Valentine's Day! Enjoy it from the bottom of your heart...your healthy heart.

And as always,
Continued Bliss


~Tell Tammy ~
How will you spend Valentine's Day this year? Let us know in the comments section below.

For the Perfect House Party, Avoid these Mistakes

Overdoing decorations or themes. Enhance your home with adequate trimmings without overwhelming it. Strategically place decorative pieces where they give the best visual effect and lend the proper mood to the area. Your party should be the theme; not the adornments. Don't deck your halls to the point where guests get tinsel-tied each time they take a step. Balance and arrange decorations for everyone to enjoy; not just the first who arrive or the last who leave. Include the seated and the standing.

Overlooking food preferences. Consider all your guests when planning your menu. Provide an array of food and drink choices for everyone; Dieters, Vegans, Drinkers and Non-drinkers. Search the internet for Cocktails, Mocktails, and a variety of other GREAT RECIPES . If you're not sure what kind of substitution you need to make for one of your guests, check with them beforehand. They'll be thrilled that you asked, and will be happy to share their favorite recipe with you and others.

Putting your food out and forgetting about it. Try to serve food throughout the duration of your party. Especially if cocktails are offered because your guests will need to "feed" their drinks. Instead of setting everything out at once, have various trays brought out in intervals. This way, food stays fresh and  your guests stay intrigued over the wonderful surprises that keep coming. They'll also stay "upright" since you're constantly giving them something to nibble on as they sip their drinks (if you know what I mean).

Cleaning only the public areas of your home. Include your personal areas when tidying up for your party; even if you plan to entertain in only one room. Don't leave personal items lying around and clear medicine cabinets of anything you don't want "accidentally eyeballed" by your guests. And most of all...

Forgetting to enjoy yourself. Give yourself enough prep time to grab a nap or just relax 30-40 minutes before your guests are due to arrive so you can greet them with a smile that's fresh and sincere. Days before your party, arrange for cleanup assistance so it's not on your mind as you watch the dishes stack up. Remember, this party is just as much for you as it is for your guests. So enjoy the fun!

~~~~~Tell Tammy~~~~~

What festivities are you planning over the holidays?

Tips for a Stress-free Holiday

Save decorating time and money this Thanksgiving. Use these tips throughout the holiday season (and also get a jump on Christmas):

1. Use white Christmas string lights to drape around the room; the mantle, tables, shelves or even add to plants.

2. Create an illuminating centerpiece with 12 clear votive candle holders. Tie a ribbon around each one and make a bow. Form a circle with the candle holders; bows facing out to give it the appearance of a wreath. Add white votive candles or use other colors that coordinate with your table. A smaller arrangement can be used for cocktail or end tables. Keep out for the holiday season or give them away to guests as they leave.

3. Create taste, function and visual appeal using small, well-shaped pumpkin gourds. Scrape out the inner meat to make pie or soup. Then create soup bowls from the shells. Or fill a large, hollowed-out pumpkin with flowers and use as table decoration.

4. Too busy for your usual workout? Try slipping in some exercise ahead of time and give your kids something to occupy their time as well:

• The day before or early Thanksgiving morning, take the kids for an early morning walk around the neighborhood.
• Turn your walk into a nature-gathering hike and round up colorful leaves, pine cones and small branches from holly berry trees.
• When back inside, lay the leaves out to dry completely. Have the kids create personalized place cards out of the leaves by inscribing guests' names in brightly contrasted marker colors. Place at each person's setting. Decorate tables, shelves and the mantle using the remaining treasures found during your walk.

Use these tips to adorn your house naturally, keep you in shape, and keep the kids occupied while you plan the greatest Thanksgiving Celebration your family has seen.

Put Life Back into the Dying Workplace Party

Do you cringe when you think of the dreaded holiday party at work with its age-old themes and done-to-death menus? If you're tired of the same old stuff, chances are your co-workers are, too. So stop the dread and make things better instead. It doesn't take a lot; just interest, an open mind, and a plan to have fun.

Jump on the planning committee if you aren't already there. Initiate holiday plans early because this time of year brings with it lots of vacations and you don't want anyone to miss out on the fun. Which brings us to the next thing...

Be sure to include everyone...yes, even the "Ebeneezer Scrooges". Include them in the planning process before they have a chance to dampen the holiday spirits of others (probably because their own spirits are in the dumps). Find out what they like to do and ask them to do it. If they enjoy baking, ask them to share their special dish; if they sing, get them to lead the group in a festive song of the season. They’ll be less likely to spread their holiday 'jeer' and will probably feel better for it…everyone else will.

Schedule games, gift-giving or other inclusive activities for later in the party, preferably toward the end. This reduces the “break-and-run after breaking bread” effect. 

And don't play the same games year after year. Rotate them for variety. Personalize regular games with workplace facts or a festive twist. Try something like musical chairs with the staff singing holiday music in place of a CD. Appoint a 'conductor' to signal the stopping points. Or play Win, Lose or Draw the best _____. You can fill in the blank with a work-related theme. 

Celebrations aren't just for celebrating families. They're also times for hope and gratitude for the blessings we have; and the workplace is a blessing. Treat it as such.  

Don't just think holiday; think fun. Be a joyful example; inspire joy throughout your team. You may just find yourself part of a miracle by making next year's party-planner out of this year's Scrooge. It's worth a try.

~~Tell Tammy

What're your holiday party plans this year? Please share with us by posting a comment below.   

The Best-Kept Secret to Turning A Difficult Customer into a Happy One

If you have a job, you have a customer; a customer who may be internal or external, virtual or physically face-to-face. They could be co-workers that you see every day or simply voices on the phone.

But no matter who your customers are, at some point, you've probably considered a few of them 'difficult'. You know the ones, those who expect you:

...to know their needs (even when they don't know themselves)
...to quickly deliver those needs, and
...to answer every demand and challenge they toss your way in order to get their needs met (and with a smile on your face to boot)

Since the success of your job lies in keeping all of your customers happy and satisfied, it's important to know one of the best-kept secrets on how to turn a difficult customer into a happy and satisfied one.

So what's the secret?

STOP CALLING THEM DIFFICULT

That's the secret?

Yes, that's it. It's that simple.
You see, it's not about what you should do; it's about what you should not do...You should not label them 'difficult'.

Here's why...

Labeling a customer 'difficult' sabotages your relationship with them and is unfair to both you and your customer because...

• You put yourself in defense mode which negatively affects your attitude toward them; an attitude that's bound to be felt by the customer and ultimately resented by them.
• It causes you to inadvertently restrict yourself from providing the full scope of service that you could be giving.
• It creates a negative impression for you, your workplace, your customer, and for anyone who hears you call them difficult.

Then why do we do it?

• Sometimes we don't realize it's what we're doing.
• Sometimes we're just repeating what we've heard others say about the customer. We may have heard  about how hard it is to please them, causing subconscious prejudgment.
• You might even feel challenged because it's you who doesn't know what to do to please them.

When you think about it, you may be the one who's actually creating the so-called difficult customers in your work life. So when you begin to think of a customer as challenging, what can you do?

You can...

• Choose a better attitude and create a better customer...a happy customer.
• View the challenge as incentive to up your game of service, and 
• Don't try to figure out what they want or need; listen for indications of what will please them. Directly or indirectly, they will let you know.

So regardless of what your customer has done in the past or what you've heard they may do in the future, the next time you feel the D-word coming on, do the right thing...the fair thing;

1) Recognize your customers for who they are and what they need...people who need your help. 
2) Then do what's necessary to help them. 

Loyalty will be created and trust will be built. And instead of thinking of them as difficult, you'll learn to appreciate them for the value they bring.